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In this episode Cath and Carly talked about Carly’s path to motherhood, her own birth, dissociation as survival, freeze and how it can impact us, how our stress responses can turn up in our sex lived, erotic life force and vitality and using this in service of ourselves and much more.
Carly Mountain is a somatic psychotherapist, sex therapist, sacred space holder, breathworker and author of Descent & Rising: Women’s Stories & the Embodiment of the Inanna Myth and Untamed Pleasure: Unleash Your True Erotic Nature. She is passionate about facilitating people to reconnect with their inherent erotic aliveness, power and pleasure.
She lives in Sheffield, England with her husband and two daughters
Website: www.carlymountain.com
Instagram: @carly_mountain
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In this episode Cath and Carly talked about Carly’s path to motherhood, her own birth, dissociation as survival, freeze and how it can impact us, how our stress responses can turn up in our sex lived, erotic life force and vitality and using this in service of ourselves and much more.
In this episode Cath talks about how when we are (breaking) and (shifting cycles) in our families we may tend at times to overcorrect and over parent. She talks about things to keep in mind around this, how this is a dance and shares some stories and pointers that may indicate this is also happening with you.
In this episode Cath speaks about the process of rupture and repair with our children. We may imagine that this is a neat, easy process (and sometimes it is) and often it is more complex and messy.
In episode 176 Cath was joined by Dr Helena Vissing. Helena shared her path to motherhood, healing from birth and her perinatal specialisation. We talked about her book ‘Somatic Maternal Healing’, some of the concepts from it, sensory considerations and maternal bodyfulness and much more.
In this episode Cath talks about getting to know and understand our own family history to get more of a picture of what we are dealing with and carrying. She shares some of her maternal and paternal family history talking about premature death, family separation, loss, loss of place, grief and also an explanation of why it is helpful to understand our history and how it can work to reduce shame.
Cath was joined by Dr Chloe Bedford this week and they talked about Chloe's path to motherhood, how much pregnancy can bring up, how Chloe tends to herself in motherhood, running and how her relationship with running has changed as she has grown herself up in motherhood.
In our first episode after the summer holidays, Cath speaks to the complexities of recovering from chronic stress, how we need to approach it (and ourselves) in a different way, how our own shame may exacerbate stress and how ADHD can make things harder.
In this episode Cath talks about her concept 'Giving Up on Being Good' and the 'Good Girl Grid'. The experience of emotional neglect produces a set of coping strategies based on our stress responses and unwinding these as we grow and develop as adults is really important so that we can live our own TRUE lives.
In the episode this week, Cath is joined by Colleen Adrian. Colleen is an author and a connected parenting coach for parents of sensitive spirited children. She’s a Mom, a Stepmom, and a Grandma and lives on a small island on the west coast of Canada.
In this episode Cath answers two listener questions. The first question is a short question related to attachment and trauma in our younger years. Have a listen to episode 14 which gives a broad overview of trauma and helps provide context for the first question. Cath will be doing a more detailed view on this material (from episode 14) in an upcoming episode.
In this episode Cath speaks about the expression of mixed feelings in motherhood and how we may move between two positions. With childhood trauma we may have more intense swings and not have much access to a ‘middle ground’.
In this episode Cath talks about our 8 sensory systems, about the importance of sensory integration, how trauma can impact this and shares some specific sensory systems and a couple of anecdotes from her own life to give you an idea about how impactful our sensory experience is.
Lisa Marchiano is an award-winning author, podcast host, and certified Jungian analyst. She is the author of three books published by Sounds True, Motherhood: Facing and Finding Yourself, The Vital Spark: Reclaim Your Outlaw Energies and Find Your Feminine Fire and Dream Wise: Unlocking the Meaning of Your Dreams. She is the cocreator and cohost of the popular depth psychology podcast This Jungian Life, and has a private practice in Philadelphia.
In this episode Cath speaks to over-functioning, how this traps many of us, breaking cycles, noticing and including ourselves in care and to stop operating like a hologram in our own lives. This is long term work with small shifts, Cath says please go gently with yourself.
Cath is joined by psychotherapist and coach Kate Merrick. Cath and Kate talked about Kate's path to motherhood, her lineage, how her ancestors turned up to support her journey, personal power in the postpartum time, advocating for our children, medical herbalism and much more.
Cath was joined by productivity strategist and home educating Mum of 3 Amanda Appiagyei this week on the podcast. Cath and Amanda talked about Amanda's path to motherhood, mothering in a neurodivergent family, how Amanda tends to herself, her nervous system, her kids and her business, breaking cycles in a black mixed race family and the complexities of dealing with our own stuff as we parent.
In this episode Cath was joined by Dr Emma Offord. Cath and Emma talked about Emma's path to motherhood, childhood trauma, how Emma tends to and advocates for herself and her children and sensory needs and how these are so important to understand, particularly in the context of families/food/parenting. We talked about autism, ADHD, neurodivergence and trauma, late diagnosis, OCD and how Emma experiences OCD and Emma talked about unmasking and how she advocates for herself in order to tend to her needs.
In this episode Cath answers a listener's letter. The content of this episode deals with the question: ‘How can we tend to ourselves when we realise some of our parenting has come from our own pain and trauma?’ How do we deal with the guilt and shame arising from this? What helps this shift?
In this episode Cath speaks about how control is such a key coping strategy for so many of us and how this rears its head at times of stress (like early motherhood) and in new situations. Control is not the solution we think it is and Cath shares a recent incident from her own life showing how control is so seductive and seems to be the answer, but really it is an illusion.
In episode 160 Cath speaks about how we have to develop our own sense of power and sovereignty as we heal from childhood trauma and how this involves really moving away from external approval. She talks about developing self trust, ceasing to gaslight ourselves and the concept of unconditional love. We have to consciously unhook from societal messages so we can craft the life of our own dreams.
In this deeply touching episode Cath was joined by attachment expert and psychotherapist Anne Power. Anne shared about her own attachment journey, some of her childhood story, boarding school, brief explanations about the different attachment styles, attachment in couple relationships and attachment, grief and repair in the parent child relationship. This episode will help you feel supported and seen.
In this rich and wide ranging episode Cath is joined by Dr Arielle Schwartz. We discussed Arielle's path to motherhood, mother wounds in her matrilineal line and how this impacted her childhood, ambivalence in motherhood, complex trauma, nervous system healing, vagal toning and much much more. This episode is woven with rich storytelling crossing multiple generations and offers so much hope to all of us on our own healing journeys.
In this loving and practical episode Cath responds to a listener question about how to manage generational clashes around the approach to dealing with emotions and how to start conversations around this. She reads the listener's letter and looks at the query from multiple points of view.
In this episode Cath speaks more about earned secure attachment, infant attachment and its relationship to adult attachment and how we can shift our patterns.
In this episode Cath starts to speak about some of the key points of attachment theory, why this is important for us as adults and starting to cultivate a sense of being fully self supporting of ourselves.
In this episode Cath talks about how many of us go into peak fantasy at this time of year and set ourselves up to have a tricky time. She talks about getting clear about what your fantasy is and to notice that and stop comparing to it.
In this episode Cath reflects on how rage may be one of the most common experiences in motherhood (particularly if we have had childhood trauma). She speaks about getting to know our own rage, the shame we might feel and how that might derail us and trying to understand what our rage might be protecting us from. She uses one of the books she talked about last week to springboard into this conversation and highlights psychological patterns by telling a couple of anecdotes.
Therapy is necessary for many of us as we heal from childhood trauma and therapy is typically 1 hour a week. That leaves 167 other hours where we may be depressed, anxious, spinning out, criticising ourselves, living in fear or stressed about our own emotions. In this episode Cath shares some of the books that have helped her move from living in fear, books that have helped dealing with grief, despair, relationship patterns and books that have helped with compassion, understanding addiction and more. This episode contains personal stories from Cath to illustrate these points.
In episode 151 Cath was joined by Kimberley Olliff-Cooper. They talked about progressive education, neurodivergence, realising how this impacted our own school experience, the possibility for changing schools and making them more fit for children, healing and growing in motherhood and understanding emotional unavailability, trauma and addiction.
Cath was joined by art psychotherapist Gerardine Boyle in this episode. Cath and Gerardine talked about how generational trauma impacts families, the legacy of emotional neglect, what is unspoken, shame and the complexity of unwinding functional freeze in the system.